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Bangalore, India – India’s twenty-eight million strong Christian community has reacted in disappointment after Sachin Tendulkar failed to resurrect his one-day international career on the third day following his recent retirement.
Christian cricket fans had expected the resurrection to happen during today’s Twenty20 international against Pakistan after pictures started to circulate on the internet this morning showing Tendulkar’s cricket coffin to be apparently empty. But a large gathering of the faithful who turned up at this evenings match were left disappointed when Tendulkar failed to make a public appearance before ascending to the media centre of the M Chinnaswamy Stadium and announcing his comeback.
The crowd – many of whom carried the now familiar Sachin 3:26 not out sign commemorating the famous schoolboy triple century that first indicated Tendulkar was the second coming of Sir Don Bradman – remained long after India suffered a five wicket defeat.
“Sachin sacrificed himself to save Indian cricket from its sins,” explained Tendulkar disciple, John Pinto, “I still have faith that he’ll resurrect his career on the third day after retirement. It’s only 11:30 now, so there’s still half an hour left in the day for a quick press conference.”
However, Christian theologian, James Kumar, remained unconvinced that Tendulkar was about to undergo a career u-turn.
“I’m baffled as to where this idea of ODI resurrection has come from. Apart from a description of the lbw law in Deuteronomy, there are no references to cricket in the Bible at all. People need to accept that Sachin has passed on to the great commentary box in the sky, which, as you know, is located in tier three of the main pavilion at Eden Gardens.”