Lord’s, London – In a move designed to shed their image of out-of-date stuffiness, the MCC, bastion of cricket traditionalism, have published the text of an email sent to Alastair Cook congratulating him on England’s “greatest victory in the British Raj”.
The email comes as part of a campaign by the 225 year old sporting institution to rebrand itself for the digital age and was made possible by the donation from one of its members of a 16K ram extension pack to boost the processing power of the club’s aging ZX81.
The email, in its entirety, reads as follows:
Many congratulations on series win<STOP>
Must count as greatest victory in the British Raj<STOP>
Remember to steal something for British Museum before setting sail home<STOP>
Regards from all at MCC<STOP>
10 SEND EMAIL
20 GOOGLE CHEERLEADER PORN
30 SEND RESULTS TO HOME COMPUTER
40 DELETE SEARCH HISTORY
50 TEXT “Steve, can you come over here and show me how to log off this thing?” to 07377456981
The email is thought to be the first sent by the MCC. It’s currently unknown whether Alastair Cook has replied.